"It is the best thing that can happen to someone, Ambrosio," Santiago says."Believing in what he says, liking what he does."Santiago is desperately looking back into his life in search of that very determining moment that ruined his entire existence and drained his being of all the meaningful and the worthwhile. He puts a devastating effort into a frame-to-frame investigation of his life through a spontaneous conversation with an old mate in order to come up with a legitimate explanation and alleviate the bitterness of his mortifying thoughts...
Recently, I had a great time reading Vargas Llosa's astonishing work, "Conversation in the Cathedral". What is perhaps of a lesser importance in his novel is Santiago's disquieting answer to his agonizing question which is revealed at the end. In the meanwhile, his mind-twisting story is progressively and cumulatively depicted and constructed through people's initially diffused and eventually converging narratives. It is actually through those numerous intertwining narratives that a myriads of apertures are opened up to Santiago's critical self-contemplation and, at the same time, social structures of power.
"It's been a long time since I've known what was proper or improper." He smiled. "Only whether it suits me or not."